I Was Silent (But You Heard Me)
by Little Miss Slytherclaw
Summary: Pansy Parkinson has only ever known silence and a single friend, and Hogwarts isn't looking too promising... until someone shows her that it's okay to be vulnerable.


**Written for Hogwarts, where I am a Slytherin (Hiss Hiss Little Miss), Assignemt #6: Psychology Task #12:** **Write about someone with speech difficulties (ie, a stutter, being unable to pronounce a certain letter, unable to say certain words)**

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 **This was also written to fill my Gris-Gris Bag: (character) Pansy Parkinson**

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 **That's it... Those are the only two prompts. Wow. This is crazy... I don't think I've had less than 10 prompts in at least the last 10 fics. Insane. Mind = Blown**

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 **Summary: Pansy Parkinson has only ever known silence and a single friend, and Hogwarts isn't looking too promising... until someone shows her that it's okay to be vulnerable**

 **Warnings: Hints at a kinda not so great home life. Also... misogyny . I think that's it.**

 **Word Count (excluding A/N): 920**

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 **I Was Silent (But You Heard Me)**

Pansy Parkinson took a deep breath as she glanced around the Great Hall, locating her house table; the sorting had been stressful, to say the least, but she succeeded in her task, despite the Sorting Hat's insistence that she would thrive in Ravenclaw. She had made it into Slytherin by the skin of her nose, but her struggles were far from over. Now, she needed to convince everyone that she belonged there.

That would be easier said than done—well, for most people. For Pansy, it might actually be harder to say it.

"Chin up, Pans," Draco said as she sat down beside him; their families were close, and so were they. Draco was the only one, aside from her mother, that knew of her daily struggles. "You can be strong without your voice."

Pansy simply shook her head, playing her mother's motto over and over in her head: if you can't be sure you'll speak correctly, don't speak at all.

That motto had gotten her through years of dinners with the pure-blood circles, and had even kept her safe from her father. As her mother put it, Antonio Parkinson didn't need to learn of his daughter's defects—it might put a strain on their relationship.

Plus, it could keep her from earning a proper husband; it was better for everyone if she were just silent.

"Parkinson, eh?" a cool voice drawled, and Pansy looked up to meet the gaze of Marcus Flint—not the most influential boy of the school, but Pansy knew his name, and knew his father. It would be best not to get on his bad side. "Antonio is your father?"

Pansy gave a subtle nod of her head, angling her nose towards him just like her mother taught her to. Flint raised an eyebrow. "Do you speak, girl?"

His tone was rough, Pansy instinctively grabbed Draco's hand underneath the table, something she had done at more than one fancy dinner. "Only when spoken to," she replied slowly, as slowly as she could, using one of the fallback phrases her mother had taught her. She had a few on hand that she had practiced ever since she was six.

"I see you were raised right," Flint said with a laugh, turning to his food, no longer deigning to look at the small girl. "Women were born to be silent."

Pansy felt Draco tense beside her, and she squeezed his hand, begging him to stay silent about it—he had gotten in trouble on her behalf more than once, but here at Hogwarts, it was more important than ever that he was on his best behavior. Draco, just like Pansy and all of the other lower-year Slytherins, was on trial.

The rest of dinner passed with Pansy silently keeping her head down, eating just enough to avoid raising suspicions. Fortunately, not one of the students engaged in conversation with her, but Pansy had a feeling that things would be different in the dorm.

She was right.

As soon as Pansy had claimed her bed, simply by sitting on the inviting looking mattress by a window that looked into the lake, another girl, this one blonde and peppy, hopped onto her mattress.

"I'm Daphne Greengrass. There aren't any sons in my family, so you might not know who I am, but Daddy speaks highly of your father. I was so excited to hear that I would get to go to school with you!" The girl spoke fast. Although her voice was pretty, and her intentions seemed to be pure, Daphne scared Pansy, and it showed on the girl's face.

Pansy had physically retracted, pulling her knees to her chest as she stared at the blonde-haired girl, her own dark hair falling around her shoulders. She had always wanted to cut it at chin length, but long hair was preferred by men, so long hair she would have.

"What's the matter?" Daphne asked, concern falling over her beautiful blue eyes. "Did I say something wrong? Oh Merlin, I'm so sorry."

Pansy wished she could hold Draco's hand, but he wasn't here; he couldn't be here. She needed to do this on her own.

"I apologize," Pansy said slowly, trying to get her body to relax. "I-I… I just—" Pansy dug her fingernails into her palms, looking away, already having made a fool of herself.

All she wanted to say was that Daphne startled her, but she couldn't manage the words.

Just when she started to feel hot tears prickling behind her eyes, a warm hand landed on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry if I startled you," Daphne said, her voice a lot quieter now. When Pansy looked back towards the girl, Daphne smiled a really soft, kind smile—it was almost as startling as her previous excitement, but Pansy felt compelled to trust that smile.

"This might sound strange," Daphne said with a shyness that hadn't been there before. "But, this will be the first time I've slept in a different bed than my sister in… a really long time. Do you… do you think I could stay with you? For just one night?"

There was something in the blonde's voice that compelled Pansy to nod, making Daphne smile thankfully.

That night, as Pansy lay in her usual, stick straight position with Daphne half sprawled on top of her, she realized that maybe, just maybe Hogwarts wasn't only for making connections. Maybe she could make a few friends, and maybe these friends wouldn't judge her as harshly as her parents and the pure-blood circle did.


End file.
